Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Rhysani's LiveJournal:

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Thursday, May 17th, 2007
7:53 am	Animal Insanity Ok, anyone else's cats (or whatever) going nuts lately?  Is it spring?  Or are my kitties just special? They're driving me mad! -Rhys Current Mood: crazy (4 Comments |Comment on this)
7:39 am	Yay!! Too excited... MoonDance is almost here!  I always love my festivals although asking off from work is fun: "Uhh, you need a week off why?" *snigger*  If they only knew what goes on... Still, all sniggers aside, it is a spiritual time and one that I need badly.  It is a time of recharge, of opening up, of complete acceptance.  This year will be interesting as there are a LOT of new folks going that I know and it will be fun (?) to be one of the few festival vets in the group. Rereading Ishmael again... need to actually go back and make full notes this time instead of just getting overwhelmed again.   How long will it take the shock of that book to finally sink into my little skull?  (BTW, for those don't know, author is Daniel Quinn... READ IT) Onto neopets!  Yay my cybersanity. Ja Ne, Rhys (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, May 12th, 2007
10:08 am	*Deep Breath* Finals are over, the grades are good.  Thank you Goddess and God for your help... Now I'm just working 40 hours a week - what a break! Registered for 16 hours in the fall. Will post more later but sleepy now... worked last night. -Rhys Current Mood: sleepy (Comment on this)
Saturday, May 5th, 2007
6:21 am	Final today! So close... one final today, one Monday.  This will be the first semester in awhile (due to sabbatical and other complications) that I've completed.  It is a nerve-wracking feeling but I'm one step closer.  Closer to what?  To nothing really... that's just it.  Each class I take I learn how better to do what I love... and yet that little piece of paper, that diploma that announces that I've accomplished something is really not the point.  The point is that I'm moving, that I am accomplishing, not that I've accomplished.  I hope once I finish school eventually (about a year or so hence) that I will continue to accomplish.  And I do it for so many reasons - for myself, for those I care for, for those I might influence.  I do not work for the system or for the world... those will take care of themselves and the best thing I can do for them would be to revamp them.  Rather, I work, I strive, I accomplish (hopefully!) for those individuals which make up the system and the world - including me. -Rhys- Side note: Pegasi, I miss you!!!!  Much love, much good vibes coming your way.  Druidmage, you too - be good, be careful.  Please, forgive my lapses in communication - I do care and miss you both.  Send love to the little one. Current Mood: quixotic (Comment on this)
Saturday, April 28th, 2007
8:25 am	Egads. Finals. Ok, so of course I want to start communciating with the world as soon as I have 50 million projects due, finals, and a bum internet connection.  *sigh* Just got off work, going to see if I can't get a few things done before i snag some sleep. Here's a thought for the day: "I'm not intelligent.  I'm an idiot exposed to intelligent ideas."   Ever feel like that?  (Or maybe it's just because I'm writing all these papers I know I'm not good enough to write...)  -Rhys- Current Mood: exhausted (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 11th, 2007
1:54 am	Yeah, so, ummm... I still exist.  I'm considring continuing the LJ thing if only to have a place to put down my public musings-turned-essays... anyone else still out there?  -Life is an intricate puzzle I work on every day... I think I have the edges done at least.  :) -Rhys- Current Mood: contemplative (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, January 11th, 2006
8:02 am	Help me out here Ok, I know this is probably a lost cause... and I know I swore off LJ forever.. but I'm hoping for a small miracle. If Becky doesn't read this, please pass it on to her. Becky, it has been two years. Yes, I still think about you and worry about you from time to time. I'm still not entirely sure what caused you to hate me but I would like us to at least resolve it. Would you believe that others still bring up our falling out to me after all this time? I love you as a sister and I must admit, I miss ya. I understand you got a job in CA... congrats! Things here are... evolved... lack of words... just please, get in contact, if only to tell me off. The email is rhysani@gmail.com All forgiven, all forgotten, Melissa/Rhys (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, October 22nd, 2003
12:31 am	An observation Something I've noticed... this year has been an interesting year for everyone... a year of change... a year of learning... The first half of the year for realizing who others are. The second half of the year for realizing who we are. -Rhys (11 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, September 16th, 2003
8:06 pm	Rantage for advau Okies... Rantage time. Heh... life's been a gryn. My trip to Huntsville was wonderful (see pics in Lycorne's LJ). My dad flew me up in the 120 Friday after classes. We flew into a little grass strip called MoonTown. My father finally met Robert and seems to like him. Unfortunalty most of Saturday Robert was working (grrr... game night kept him there for 11 hours) but we made up for it by staying up till 6 am discussing philosophy. *BIG Gryn* Dinner in B'ham with Ashley, Becky, Robert, and Margaret (Beck-chan's mom) was great. ;) I'm glad to be able to get out around people again without too much anxiety. I'm getting there. Slowly but I am. New kitten!! Please welcome to the Weyr Kellindil, Kell for short. Absolutly kawaii. He's about 6 weeks old and doing really well. Mara and Kash aren't too happy but they'll get over it. Let's see... hmmm... anything else? No, not really. Still thinking too much but I think I've finally found a Balance so things aren't so frantic. On Dragon's Wings, Rhysani Current Mood: devious Current Music: Anime being played in club (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 10th, 2003
1:47 am	oh, BIG surprise... Which Rainbow Brite kid are you? By Growing. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, September 9th, 2003
11:15 pm	Ayya I either pissed a deity off or made one very happy... perhaps both. I was unsure whether to friends lock this entry or not but I decided that being open and honest is the most important and that hopefully others can learn from my experiences. Judge me or don't, hate me or not, nothing changes what I've learned and what my life is like now. First, foremost, and ecstatically: I've found my soulmate. Simple as that sentence, it's true. Robert, I love you. I didn't even know it was possible-- but there are no doubts. There is not a whole lot I can say here... sometimes the fewest words say the most... I've found my Balance. Now for the good/bad news. I spent Wednesday night in the hospital due to the BPD. I'm fine, it was just a rough experience. The upside of it is that I'm finally now able to get some help. They've got me started on some meds and I'll be talking to a counselor as well. There are two sides to everything... I do not ever want to repeat what I went through Wed and Thurs but I'm glad it made a difference. Unfortunately due to my hospital sleep over and the BPD, I've gotten "iffy" around people sometimes now. It's not a paranoia, more like an anxiety. I'm fine with one-on-one and small groups but any more than 4 people or so, or if it gets really chaotic/loud/etc, I get a feeling of fear and REALLY uncomfortable. The idea of classes is terrifying me. Hopefully this will pass. Please everyone, just be patient with me. I'll update more later as I think of it... right now it's bring up too many memories. Neopets time! On Dragon's Wings, Rhysani Current Mood: quixotic Current Music: As Time Goes By (1 Comment |Comment on this)
11:00 pm	You are "Welcome to the Caribbean, love." You're more than a little world-weary, but also intelligent and you keep your head when things get dodgy. You're everybody's favorite drinking buddy, but your stubbornness does get in the way sometimes. Which one of Captain Jack Sparrow's bizarre sayings from Pirates of the Caribbean are you? brought to you by Quizilla (Comment on this)
10:53 pm	Oooo... update.... You excel at Potions. Either you're one twisted sister or you're on a certain someone's good side. Which Class at Hogwarts Would You Excel at? brought to you by Quizilla (Comment on this)
Monday, September 8th, 2003
5:21 am	Too True, too true... I am a A Spirit Dragon! Hey, I took the http://dragonhame.com online Inner Dragon quiz and found out I am a Spirit Dragon on the inside. In the war between good and evil, a Spirit Dragon tends to walk the fine line of Neutrality.... When it comes to the powers of Chaos vs. those of Law and Order, your inner dragon is a risk taker and answers to no one.... As far as magical tendancies, Magical spells come as natural to the Spirit Dragon as breathe from it's body.... During combat situations, a true Spirit Dragon prefers to defeat opponents by the use of spells and other tactics.... The spirit dragon is a true creature of chaos, it is very nomadic and goes wherever it pleases. Due to its non-corporeal nature, a spirit dragon moves freely anywhere and everywhere.' A spirit dragon is a living mystery. They are barely visible to the naked eye, as their bodies are formed from the ghost-like material of the soul.' A Spirit Dragon is nearly impossible to harm except by means of powerfully enchanted weapons and magical spells. The spirit dragon has no physical substance and cannot manipulate the physical world without the use of Spells and Magic. However, be warned that this does not mean the spirit dragon is of no consequence. They are masters of magic and take a large part in the happenings of the mortal world around them. They are often seen as puppeteers behind the stage of reality. ' This Dragons favorite elements are: Soulstone, Hematite, and Wind Http://Dragonhame.Com (Comment on this)
Monday, August 11th, 2003
4:42 am	Update second.... Oye, where to begin on an update? To start of, Chris (Kyndig) and I are officially apart. Saw this coming a LONG way away. Unlike past hiatuses, this break is permanant. If we ever do get back together, it will be far in the future and as two very different individuals. Tis for the best, we both know. We remain best friends and recognize that our bond is one that cannot be broken... we understand each other and despite bickering (which our friends have heard enough of!!) we will always be part of the other, though not as a couple. Love ya Kyn Kyn. Best friends always. Please, any long-haired rouges/philosphers, feel free to court the dragon. Singleness is only fun for so long. I have auditions in 9 days. For those who do not know, these auditons are to be accepted into the BFA program at Auburn University. Basically, I can be a theatre major if I want, but to be a PERFORMANCE major I have to audition. These auditions are doozies and not something I can play with. I've been without the stage too long as is... this means too much... ye gods... *cocky half-grin* Here's hoping!!! My health has been MUCH better. Though the back is still giving constant issues, I'm generally alright. It's about time; I'm sick (pun intended) of a weak constitution. *Stretches wings* I FEEL BETTER!!!!!!!!!! Registered for Fall Fling... This alone made my day MUCH better. FYI, Fall Fling is the balance to MoonDance, Pagan gatherings held once a year (that two gatherings a year for those paying attention) at Dragon Hills. These times are my recharge times and much needed. Gods... Fall Fling cannot get here fast enough. Need that weekend BADLY. C'mon, I dare ya, get between me and Dragon Hills. The job sitch is waiting till after auditions. I simply cannot keep my focus on both at once. Theatre comes first, always. As all who know me realize... my theatre comes before anything, anyone. Sorry, 'tis my nature. Money is tight but I have dealt with such conditions before. The challenge is fun. :) My car is finally working. Ayya, but it is frustrating trying to deal with 'rents!! They live in their own little world and only deal with mine at their convenience... perhaps one day they will realize the worth of my input and the validity of my views... till then I suppose I just bite my tongue (often!) and do my damnedest to be the daughter that makes them happy. I cannot stand to see my parents' tears... but I cannot compromise who I am and how I feel!!!!! The nightmares are coming and going. I do not like dealing with them but my choices are limited. *tosses a penny* Here's to sweet dreams. Still have not contacted that therapist about the BPD. I need to but something seems to always come up. (Self-sabatoge?) Perhaps after auditions and once stabilized...? The BPD is getting worse every day but I'm handling it. The routine things are the hardest... my apartment needs help. All in all though, I'm doing better than I have the past couple of weeks. It's a waxing moon, I'm feeling productive and I know that no matter the trials.... all passes. I'll just gryn, raise an eyebrow, and toss off a smart-ass remark. This unique dragon is doing just peachy-keen. On Dragon's Wings, Rhysani Current Mood: quixotic Current Music: Sailor Moon -- Luna Rock (5 Comments |Comment on this)
4:15 am	Quizzes (as usual) first...... You come from the Night Sky. You're drawn to the stars and planets, and it's no wonder why, you came from them. Where Did Your Soul Originate? brought to you by Quizilla Fight Club! What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!) brought to you by Quizilla Demon:A being of pure darkness, you live to orment those around you. Your one mean bastard, but then again most demons are... What legendary creature are you? brought to you by Quizilla Dream, the third of The Endless, you are in charge of the Dreaming, all imagination and creativity, everyone knows your beautiful realm, but none truly understand it. You are dark and brooding, creative, and spend a lot of time by yourself, just thinking. You are almost as serious as Destiny, but not quite. Everyone is enchanted by you, but you keep them all at a distance, even when you shouldn't. Which Endless are you? brought to you by Quizilla You are Oona, a willful sprite that cares for Jack and has sercets she she tries to keep from others. What Legend Character Are You? brought to you by Quizilla SPIRIT is your chinese symbol! What Chinese Symbol Are You? -- Updated (7/21/03) brought to you by Quizilla Marie Which Lesser Known Moulin Rouge Character Are You? brought to you by Quizilla You are Jareth. You're arrogant. Proud. You are a leader and you demand respect. You're a romantic at heart, whether or not you always show it and I'll be damned if you don't look good in tights... Which Fairytale Update or Labyrinth Character Are You? brought to you by Quizilla You are the gothic tower outfit! Which Moulin Rouge Satine costume are you? brought to you by Quizilla No big surprise on any of the quizzes. Answer questions honestly... -Rhysani Current Mood: awake (Comment on this)
Friday, July 25th, 2003
9:59 pm	Quizzes!!!!!!!! You are... 'Wait, this is supposed to be a punishment?' Yeah, I'm a little confused, too. Stuck on a beautiful deserted island with a shitload of rum and Captain Jack Sparrow... What's not to like?! If you want to leave this place, you are CRAZY! What random made up thought from Pirates of the Caribbean are you? brought to you by Quizilla Primary Ability: Farseeker Farseekers posses the ability to communicate over great distances via telepathy. They are great friends who know when they're needed, and seem to be able to detect others thoughts. Secondary Ability: Futureteller Futuretellers have an uncanny knack of knowing what is going to happen, well before anybody else. Alot of futuretellers have truedreams, whereas some, like Brydda, have what they call a 'sixth sense'. Futuretellers are usually very quiet, and reserved, yet they are loyal and trustworthy. What is your Misfit Talent? You're a punk unicorn. What can I say? You smoke to much and you're sarcastic, and I don't appreciate being called a jerk. Hmmph. But I made a cute little picture for you, out of the goodness of my heart. What Kind of Unicorn are YOU? (no, really..its cool- with graphics!) brought to you by Quizilla Lady Macbeth Which Legendary Queen Are You? brought to you by Quizilla (Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 15th, 2003
3:08 am	You represent... angst. You have an extremely cynical outlook on just about everything. It's okay to sulk and be depressed, but life is short, and you only get one. It's only what you make it, and only you can make it improve. What feeling do you represent? brought to you by Quizilla I didn't cheat!!!!! -Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend. Which means you're rare or that you cheated :P You're the kind of chick that can hang out with your boyfriend's friends and be silly. You don't care about presents or about going to fancy placed. Hell, just hang out. You're just happy being around your boyfriend. What Kind of Girlfriend Are You? brought to you by Quizilla (1 Comment |Comment on this)
2:45 am	Forgive the horrendous writing... slight non-soberness I'm doing so much better this week! I did not realize one could have such a good day... First off, other than the back hurting and spasming randomly (thus the alcohol-- a natural muscle relaxer), I'm doing well health-wise. I caught up with John today (the cutie Irish one), along with seeing my Jean-Claude. Already a good day. In addition, I have two new members to my family. A degu (think giant gerbil) named Puck, and a hedgie named Oberon (Thanks for the name Glit-chan!!). Both are doing well and seem to be enjoying their new home. I managed to get both for free; Puck from Jean-Claude who isn't in town enough to take care of him properly, and Oberon from a friend at a pet store who uses him for a breeding stud but is willing to give him up otherwise. Both are well behaved and Oberon especially is remarkable for a hedgehog because of his sweet temperament. I guess getting laid his whole life helps, eh? Kyndig and I are doing better though I still enjoy my freedom and dating. Who knows, maybe we'll end up permanently together... but I'm just taking everything one day at a time. Sharith and R'yan can't ever seem to leave my love life alone anyway. Audition stuff is really wearing me down. There is so much to do and so, so, little time!! I'm putting in several hours every day solely for it. It's stressing me out but I'll make it through ok. I always can with theatre stuff. Perhaps more later... Abyssinia. On Dragon's Wings, Rhys Current Mood: excited Current Music: My hedgie Oberon running in his wheel. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, July 10th, 2003
8:40 am	That's it, I QUIT!!!!! I am DONE with being sane!!!!!!!! I am FINISHED with trying to deal with all the shit being thrown at me at once! I'm tired of being strong. I'm tired of always "coping". Look, everyone just excuse me, I'm going to disappear for a couple of days. Fuck the world. And, frankly, fuck anyone worrying. Just don't, ok? I really feel sorry for anyone darkening my doorstep with the exception of two people. If you are not one of the two, you'll know REAL quick. This is Rhysani signing off and saying leave me the fuck alone. Current Mood: stressed (2 Comments |Comment on this)